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Joke of the Day

"Everytime I check my facebook I remember why i'm on Twitter."

"How did you do in your tests ? I did what George Washington did ! What was that ? Went down in history !"

"Im not white im Jewish.."

"Caught my Vegan roommate... Caught my Vegan roommate crying today while chopping onions. These people are taking it too far now!"

"What did Adam say to Eve? Stand back I don't know how big this thing gets!"

"I hope the rain keeps up so it won't come down."

"How did LaKeisha's Mom finally stop her from bouncing on the trampoline in the rec room? She put a piece of velcro on the ceiling."

"He said I was average - but he was just being mean."

"Sucks the USA lost. Now we can't keep watching TV at work."

"Peanut Butter and Jam Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass."