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Joke of the Day

"I'm sick of pretending. I'm ready to tend!"

"How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? it's a pretty obscure number.... i'm sure you haven't heard of it."

"Why do elephants do well in school ? Because they have a lot of grey matter !"

"Mad at your man? Five minutes before he gets home, turn on ""Pitch Perfect"" then hide the remote in the dishwasher."

"How does Harry Potter like his sandwiches to be cut ? Diagon alley"

"Crack babies are really sad but meth babies are super productive."

"If a tree falls on a woman... And nobody is around to hear it. Why was there a tree in the kitchen?"

"How is a woman like a condom? They both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick!"

"I wake up relatively happy every morning. Then I interact with other people and things change quickly."

"What type of condom does Spock use? Vulcanized rubber!"