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Joke of the Day

"How do you lose 30 pounds in 1 Minute? Go to England and buy something"

"Waiter: Is Pepsi okay? Me: Is Kohl's cash okay?"

"i feel wrong i think im having a dyslexic stroke. i cant smell anything on the left side of my body and i feel toast."

"Coworker to me: "" Why are you always rushing out of here after work? You're single with no kids."" Me: "" Exactly."""

"What do Iron man and Sarah Palin have in common? They both had a little Downey inside of them."

"Why do authors subtitle their books, ""A Novel"". Did someone look at their book one day and say ""I thought this was a sandwich?"""

"How many militant feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick."

"There was an explosion at my favorite restaurant last night. News reports say that someone ordered the ""chicken a la Hu-akbar."""

"GRADUATION TIP: Don't graduate! The real world is terrifying. Hide out in the library. They can't make you leave if they can't find you!"

"Whoever made the song ""Let It Snow"" Must have been horny. Le tItS now? Cmon"