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Joke of the Day

"Remember in 90's movies when the hot girl would enter a party in slow motion? That's what happens when I walk in a buffet."

"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana"

"What does the alchemist do to please his girlfriend? Elixir."

"Matchbooks exist just to be clues in detective movies."

"What's the cheapest meat you can buy? Deer Balls...they're under a buck"

"Men are like old car tires. Balding full of hot air and it never hurts to have a spare."

"Bears spend a bunch of time getting fat, sleep for a few months and then wake up skinny. Being a human is terrible."

"Step aside coffee, this is a job for alcohol."

"My wife left me because she said I made a meal out of everything. I intend to make her eat those words."

"Did you know that Will Smith is a black smith?"