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Joke of the Day

"Step aside coffee, this is a job for alcohol."

"Did you hear about the idiot who planted Cheerios in his backyard? He thought they were donut seeds."

"What do you call a hippopotamus that's a gigalo? A hit-the-spotimus."

"What do you call a black priest? Holy Shit."

"Yo mama so fat.... pickup lines don't work on her."

"Our dishwasher works exceedingly well, as long as you only put clean dishes in it."

"My friend lost his left hand... He's all right now."

"I believe: - I can fly. - Children are the future. - Knowledge is power. - I will use my powers to defeat the future children."

"I Saw a Huge Seagull Today It was big enough to be a D Gull. But not quite big enough to be an Eagle"

"M-I can't go. My Ewok is sick. H-Gigi that's a stuffed animal. M- H- M-Crap. I think you're right. I bet he ate all my Doritos again."