44231

Joke of the Day

"How does Jack Frost get to work? By icicles"

"Knock knock! Who's there? Hillary Clinton. Hillary Clinton who? ...Who's asking?"

"Please go play with your brother. That's basically the reason we had him."

"Q: What's the difference between Janet Reno and a school bus driver? A: The bus driver stops to let the kids out."

"Alzheimer's cop: do you know why I pulled you over?"

"They say they're free weights, but the gym gets pissed if you put them in your car and leave."

"So apparently Garry glitter has gone down, ON LITTLE GIRLS HAHEHHEHEE (heat plz)"

"I got pizza grease on my newspaper today And thought I'd developed x-ray vision."

"I went to a new zoo that has opened up in my area yesterday. Wasn't really worth it, they had one animal and it was a dog. Turns out it was a Shih Tzu."

"How many Freuds does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to change the lightbulb and another to hold the penis. ... ... ... Er... I mean... The ladder."