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Joke of the Day
"How does Jackie Chan karate chop things over there? AYA!!"
Next Joke
"#Parenthood Throwing a ball to a two year old is like....well...playing ""throw a ball and go get it yourself""...."
"[NSFW] What's the difference between pussy and parsley? Nobody eats parsley."
"ME[David Attenborough voice] Starting with the outer layers he'll devour the entire carcass HER: are you narrating yourself eating lasagna?"
"Why do SJWs hate Apple computers? Because they're not PC"
"They said the building was made from adobe... ... but then it disappeared in a flash."
"What is the best part about a prostitute dying in the middle of your session? The next hour is free."
"I turned in my letter of resignation to my smug supervisor at the refrigeration plant. He accepted it with his usual air of condensation."
"Two scientists walk into a bar... One asks for a H2O, the other asks for a H2O too. The bartender hands them both glasses of water and asks them why they're talking in scientific terms."
"Maybe if wommen's uteroids weren't such powerful mystery-swamps, the GOP wouldn't have to police them with #light & #K9 units."