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Joke of the Day

"I have never met a farmer that isn't pro tractor"

"How does Optimus Prime stay young looking? Autobotulism"

"I complimented my chemistry professor, who's from Germany, ""Sir, you're so effervescent."" He replied, ""Did you effer see me when I effer vasn't?"""

"Just a simple solution. Obviously North Korea made a mistake, although we should forgive and forget. Who knows... Maybe Japan hacked Sony? Yeah... Lets blame Sony."

"Married Couple Friend:hey how's your married life buddy..... Jhon: 20 years before it was like heaven ....... 20 years after no fucks given"

"A speech should be like a woman's skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to keep it interesting!"

"A girl grabbed my cock and said, ""Wow! Your dick wouldn't make a very good clock."" ""Why?"" I asked, intrigued. ""Because I'd struggle to get a second hand on it,"" she replied."

"When a dirty kid has finished taking a bath what is still dirty? The bathtub."

"I saw a black guy riding a bike... At first I thought it was mine, then I realized mine is at home, washing the dishes."

"Love is a two way street but you have to be careful because women can't drive."