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Joke of the Day

"I am so dwarf that... I am so dwarf that people don't take me seriously enough to win any competition other than stand up comedy!"

"What do you call an elf that follows Scientology? Elron Hubbard"

"My Favorite Joke (Sorry Cat Lovers) How do you make a cat go Woof? Soak it in gasoline and throw it in a fire place!"

"How do girls know when they are adults? When they start to like spankings"

"How do you make one girl disappear? ..just add a G and now she's gone."

"Socialist jokes aren't funny.... Unless everybody gets them."

"Did you hear the one about the gay man on the patch? Word is he's down to about four butts a day."

"How many teenage girls does it take to change a lightbulb? 11. 1 to change the lightbulb & 10 to take 200 photos of it & clog my newsfeed."

"I can swallow a rope and poop out a lasso I shit you knot."

"How do you troll an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask which period it's from."