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Joke of the Day

"A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police He's now a seasoned veteran."

"Sometimes when i don't want my wife to find something I Put it in her purse"

"What did the fish say when it swam into the wall? Dam."

"Teacher: You seem very well read have you read Shakespeare ? Pupil: No Teacher: What have you read then ? Pupil: Umm I've got red hair !"

"They're not called ""butt hole mirrors."" They're called ""hand mirrors,"" according to this clerk at Walgreens."

"A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair."

"What is the difference between Christmas music and Kobe Bryant? Christmas music will still be playing next year."

"What's the difference between an optimist and a pessimist? One sees a glass half full, the other doesn't care because the glass is going to fall and break anyways."

"Yo mama so poor... She had to get her haircut at Good Clips."

"My neighbors loved the music so much when I turned it up, that they invited the police to listen. :)"