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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an optimist and a pessimist? One sees a glass half full, the other doesn't care because the glass is going to fall and break anyways."

"I wonder if girls on dates in the 1800's got mad at guys for checking their treasure maps."

"How can you tell when a Software Developer is an extrovert ? He looks at *your* shoes when he's talking to you."

"Why are people afraid of Donald Trump? Because he's run more buildings into the ground than Al-Qaeda."

"""It's impossible."" said pride. ""It's risky."" said experience. ""It's pointless."" said reason. ""Ggrraadrttgrrtrr."" said Chewbacca."

"Did you hear about helicopter that crashed into that graveyard? Police have so far recovered 54 bodies"

"My girlfriend's body is like poetry... ...It bores me. *I really love my girlfriend, and her body is not like poetry, just so ya know :p"

"The Chinese emperor went out on a guys night. It was the man-date of heaven."

"Autocorrect changed Friend to Fiend but sleeping with a Fiend with Benefits is actually a little more exhilarating"

"Why did the computer overheat? Because windows wasn't open."