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Joke of the Day

"[handing out condoms to trick or treaters] give these to your parents, I don't want more of you coming back next year"

"Have you ever tried eating a clock? It is very time consuming"

"What's the difference between hitler and a gay man. A 45 degree angle."

"I'll never forget my Granddad's last words before he kicked the bucket. 'How far do you reckon I can kick this bucket?'"

"Two Kentucky psychology majors were walking through the campus. ""Do you consider a 1441.Q. high?"" ""Yes!"" ""For the whole basketball team?"""

"Say ""I won a math debate"" 5 times really fast! Now slap yourself for being such a pervert."

"/r/Jokes/ wins Friend of the Planet award! for 96% recycled content."

"Yo mama is missing a finger and can't count past nine."

"Why are astronauts successful people ? Because they always go up in the world !"

"What weighs 4 tons and is bright red ? An elephant holding its breath !"