41951

Joke of the Day

"[handing out condoms to trick or treaters] give these to your parents, I don't want more of you coming back next year"

"Whats a joke so bad its funny? I just want some really hillarious jokes, preferably long ones"

"What drink did Hitler absolutely hate the taste of? Juice."

"My wife claims watching me do karate ""isn't foreplay."" Why am I even alive."

"Why did the walrus go to the Tupperware party? To find a tight seal"

"Actually, I'd rather you shut your talk-hole, not your pie-hole. If you have a hole that gives pie, I'm going in there, because HELLO PIE."

"What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and Scotsman? The Rolling Stones say ""Hey, you, get off of my cloud."" A Scotsman says ""Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe."""

"How does a young man make an old woman feel young again? Elixir"

"Dad, the dog is having sex. Don't mind it, son, it's nature. Yes, I know dad. But it hurts!"

"Whats got two legs and bleeds? Half a dog!"