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Joke of the Day

"How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying ""Aww, how brave."""

"Did you hear about the stupid water-polo player? His horse drowned . . ."

"Americans should be asking Santa for better presidential candidates and nothing else."

"Donald Trump has written several books on business... and they all end in chapter eleven. Credit to Triumph for that one."

"I tried to go into a restaurant playing Pokemon go. I couldn't get in though. The servers were too busy."

"Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because it was dead."

"My 4 yr old came in my room last night at 3am. I asked him what was wrong and he said ""how many eyebrows do I have?"""

"Why are fire trucks red? You would be too if someone was pulling on your hose all day."

"Me: Treat yo self My Bank Account: DO NOT TREAT YO SELF"

"how many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? None; they're content to wander around in the dark pretending everything's okay."