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Joke of the Day

"1995: the information superhighway will mean anyone can do anything from anywhere 2015: must be willing to relocate to San Francisco"

"According to my fitness app, I ate a 6 mile fruit roll-up."

"I realised today after seeing gray hair in the mirror that my dream of being a child star will never happen."

"My wife says she hates domestic abuse So I now do my crunches outside the house"

"Did you hear about the guy who lost his left leg and arm in a car crash? He's all right now."

"[doctor gets job as 911 operator] ""What's your emergency?"" MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE ""Hmm ok let's wait a few weeks and see how it is then"""

"Baby you were beautiful Until your Photoshop 30 days trial expired"

"Why do white girls like Apple? Because once go Mac you never go back."

"I was gonna tell a Holocaust joke but I ran out of gas."

"Real frogs call him Kermit The Fraud."