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Joke of the Day

"What did Pac-Man say when he almost got run over? I'm Waka-Waka-Waka-Walking here!"

"You know what's funny about Internet Explorer? Punch line buffering..."

"Salesman: That suit looks nice. It fits like a bandage. Customer: Thanks. I bought it by accident."

"Hello? Fred's Restaurant. Hello! I'd like to know do you serve crabs? We serve anyone sir! Come on in!"

"I just deleted all the German names from my phone Now it's Hans free."

"The strangest thing happened. A coworker who always says, ""Living the dream"" was mysteriously stabbed 37 times in the neck with my car keys."

"I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching my license plate before I ran down all the people I hate"

"Just finished going through the terms and conditions for iOS 6 with my lawyers. Looks good, guys, I think I'm going to accept."

"""I'll be a dentist. Then they'll love me."" ""We're terrified of dentists."" ""I'll kill a lion!"" ""It was a beloved lion with a name."" ""Dammit."""

"Accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles last night My next shit could spell trouble"