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Joke of the Day

"Why being called handsome is an insult When you have a 3 way, it's called a threesome When you have a 2 way, it's called a twosome When you have a 1 way, it's called a handsome"

"Autocorrect is like the kid in class who got ONE right and now he won't stop raising his hand."

"The E. coli in the city water supply means I am just one glass away from my goal weight."

"The last time Twitter was down I realized it didn't take 6 hours to poop."

"Remember the 7-Mile Spanking Machine? Turns out there will also be a punch line."

"What's the worst part of having a lung transplant? Knowing that the first couple of times you cough that the phlegm isn't yours."

"A man walks into a bar.... ...sits down, orders a beer, and begins to gaze longingly at the barmaid. The barmaid hands him the beer, returns the stare and says... ""Take a pitcher, it'll last longer."""

"Jared from Subway got raided for child porn. That gives a whole new meaning to ""Eat Fresh"""

"how does jesus make coffee? hebrews it."

"TIL that Hitler never ate cake Apparently all the ovens were already being used."