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Joke of the Day

"Me: How are you? Coworker: I can't complain. Me: *sticks finger in his coffee* Coworker: I just paid for that! Me: I knew you were lying."

"Louise Jokes (my own jokes towards to my friend louise) ENJOY THESE LOUISE JOKES AND ALSO IF YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ANY OF THEM ILL REPLY TO SOME OF THEM THAT I MADE AND ILL EXPLAIN THE JOKE"

"Few things can match the satisfaction of high-fiving someone who is trying to give you the Talk To The Hand gesture."

"Why did Yellow divorce Green? Because Green blue Indigo."

"Mainstream Media: Obama signs repeal of DADT. Fox News: Foreigner masquerading as President admits he's gay."

"Did you know there's actually 4 scientific bonds? * Ionic Bond * Metallic Bond * Covalent Bond * James Bond"

"*dancing with the stars* *all of a sudden there's a fault in our stars* me(to stars): what the hell guys? we practiced this! *star wars*"

"Why do Jewish men have to be circumcised? Because a Jewish women wont touch anything unless it's 20% off."

"Big explosion down at the Cheese factory today... I guess it completely leveled the place, All that was left was Da Brie."

"My next relationship will be with someone who thinks ""Wine"" is a perfectly acceptable answer when he asks what's for dinner."