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Joke of the Day

"Why do you call these girls broads? Cause I don't wanna be specific"

"Dr. Frankenstein: The original body-builder!"

"What presidential candidate currently has a beard? Hillary Clinton."

"What's the difference between a Zippo and a Hippo? One is heavy, and one is a little lighter"

"Animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before the last earthquake,our dog took the car keys and drove off"

"I've lost all ability to feel... I'm numb.... I'm starting to slip away... I look forward to the empty, meaningless void Now pull the damn tooth, Doctor"

"Cheesy Joke If you're gonna make a cheesy joke, Cheddar make it Gouda."

"[fakes allergic reaction at dinner] Me: I-I'm- [clutches chest & falls to floor] I'm gonna need you to pay for me"

"My bro and I are building a bar. My step bro and I want to build a bar in Aushwitz to tap an undiscovered tourism market. We want to call it Gin and Jews."

"I told my girlfriend she'd look better with her hair back Apparently that's not an appropriate thing to say to a chemo patient"