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Joke of the Day

"I'm participating in a 0.25K run to raise awareness for people with attention deficit disorder."

"Rapture's tomorrow. Christians will be flying up into the air to meet Jesus. Two words: DUCK HUNT"

"Can I buy you a drink? ""I don't drink."" *panics* Oh. Um...well, here's $12."

"I like when I see a 30mph speed limit sign spraypainted to say 80. Whoever does that has found a way to completely beat the system"

"whenever my Girlfriend say something funny... i reply: Hahahahahhavesexwithmehahahah"

"Why did Microsoft go from windows 8 to 10 Because 7 8 9"

"What do you say to a girl with small tits? NOTHING!"

"What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being special."

"I found my first gray pube the other day. It was in a kebab."

"Trump Jesus asked the Devil if he'd made a deal with Donald Trump. The Devil said they'd negotiated for a while but eventually he gave up and just let Trump buy him out."