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Joke of the Day
"I'm just a girl, standing in my kitchen, forgetting what I came in here for."
Next Joke
 
"I ducked into a crowd of guys bro hugging as they left the bar, they didn't notice the stranger in their midst and I'm feeling so loved rn."
"Q: What did Boris Yelstin say when asked if meeting Clinton made want to convert Russia to the type of government they have in America? A: ""Never! I'm not going to let my wife run the country!!"""
"A butcher backed into a meat grinder... He got a little behind in his work."
"What do Saiyans and Kelly Clarkson have in common? (x-post r/funny) What doesn't kill them, makes them stronger."
"My girlfriend said she wanted me to tease her: I replied with, ""Alright, fatty."""
"What did one calculator say to the other when it was time for it to leave? Aight I'll calcu-lata"
"What did my wife say to me? I want a divorce"
"Confuse future archeologists by burying your pets in elaborate military uniforms."
"A suicide bomber, a member of an ethnic minority, my girlfriend, a priest, and a blonde walk into a bar. The bartender says ""What is this, /r/Jokes?"""