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Joke of the Day

"What did Darth Vader say to Luke on his birthday? I know what you're going to get, I felt your presents"

"What does a Satanist take when their allergies to Christians act up? Anti*Christ*amine's"

"*lights a scented candle in my house *gets texted 500 miles away from my mother Please watch those candles"

"I can't believe that those two are still together after all that shit..."

"How many WASPs does it take to change a lightbulb? One."

"Just read ""four years after pregnancy 38% of moms still were not drinking"" I think it's safe to say this survey was not done on Twitter."

"Just finished the first chapter of this novel. Tons of characters with the same name and really hard to follow. Sir, that's a phone book."

"Knock knock. Who's there? The Jews. The Jews who? Don't question us, that's anti semitic."

"""What's it like being a female comic?"" ""Well, you get asked what it's like being a female comic a lot."""

"Wings are the leading cause of bird flew"