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Joke of the Day

"Wings are the leading cause of bird flew"

"How is the Easter Bunny like Shaquille O'Neal? They're both famous for stuffing baskets!"

"WIFE: I want u to be more spontaneous ME: ok [later] ME: *hides in closet with goalie mask on waiting for her to walk by*"

"Why do male prostitutes make more money than females? Because they always drive a *Hard* bargain. :D"

"Two Chemists Two chemists go out for a nice meal. The drinks were okay. The meal was OK too. They both died."

"I still believe in love. But I also believe in sasquatch, nessy, and that I could win the lottery. So there's that...."

"My friend tried to sell me a triangular monitor but I knew it was just a pyramid screen."

"All I'm saying is that the cheese grater wouldn't have 4 sides if they wanted you to wash it after EVERY use."

"Conversations with my pets: Me: Please could you Dog: OF COURSE! Me: I haven't said what it Dog: I LOVE YOU! Me: Please could you Cat: No."

"My liver's so black, it went to a respected college, got a great job, and made it's family very proud. Weren't expecting that, huh? Racist."