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Joke of the Day

"There is a piece of aluminum foil blowing across the road and all I can think is that one of you is without your protective headgear today."

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"Girl are you a Louis Vuitton store? Because I've never been inside you and probably never will unless I'm rich one day."
"Losing my virginity was alot like performing a heart transplant operation. Someone had to die for it to happen."
"If Jessica Simpson doesn't name one of her kids ""Homer"", then seriously what's the point?"
"*hits bong* *abuses bong* *bong calls bong protection agency* *bong custody taken* *bong put in foster home* *bong misses old life*"
"Take your ex out tonight (one bullet oughtta do it)"
"Why did the programmer quit his job? He didn't get arrays... edit: After googling I found out this joke already existed :|"
"Face tattoos are a great way to let people know that you don't owe on any student loans."
"And the Lord said unto John ""come fourth, and ye shall have eternal life."" John came in 5th, and won a toaster."
"I like my coffee like I like my women Ground up and in my freezer"