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Joke of the Day

"My son has just earned his first boy scout award for 'video gaming'. I guess the next ones will be for 'social ineptitude' & 'pale skin'."

"Boy: grandma, have you seen my pills? They were labelled LSD. Grandma: f*ck the pills. Have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?"

"i think it's about time we get honest with children about how they're bad at most things"

"""Matt, you just need to date the type of person that will always be there for you!"" [tries to date pizza] [gets friend calzoned]"

"Me: Damn girl your new selfie is awesome but isn't it a bit late to zombiefy yourself? Her: What's zombiefy? Me: ...Your hair looks great!"

"What does Zeus wear under his tunic? Thunderwear!"

"How deep is the average vagina Deep enough for a man to lose his house, car, his dog and half his assets"

"11/10 people don't understand statistics ."

"What do you call a tennis match between Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder? Endless love."

"What is Reddits favorite country? Chi-LE!!!!!!!!!! My girlfriend came up with that one hope u guys love it as much as I do!!!!! :)"