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Joke of the Day

"Teach a man to Google how to fish and he'll wind up looking at fish porn for the rest of his life."

"A really hot girl walks into a bar... brb"

"My son asked me what it's like to be married... So I took his iPod and deleted all of his songs except for one."

"A guy who wears a ring is always a dealbreaker. If it's on his ring finger, he's married. If it's not, he's a guy who wears rings."

"Cop: Where were you at the time of the murder? Me: I'd trapped myself in a Tupperware container Cop: Damn, that's an air tight alibi"

"I saw a man at the beach going ""Help! Shark! Help!"" I laughed because I knew that the shark wasn't going to help him."

"[OC] What do you get when you rub two orange juice boxes together? Pulp friction."

"What do you call a fear of horned bovines? Aurochnophobia."

"My mom asked me what I was doing for Easter ... I said, ""Same as Jesus. Going out on Friday and coming back Sunday"""

"What kind of doctor is always on call? An oncologist."