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Joke of the Day

"The Captain and Tennille are divorcing. Tennille left him after learning he was only a Petty Officer, Third Class."

"Her parents wanted her to date someone of her own ethnicity. But Polly wanted a cracker."

"So an iPhone 7 gets arrested... He puts on his earpods and smugly declares ""sorry, you can't charge me while I'm using my headphones""."

"I have a silly friend named Oedipus... He's a stupid motherfucker."

"If ""the word impossible is not in your vocabulary"", you have a pretty limited vocabulary."

"What does a Thesaurus eat for breakfast? A Synonym Roll."

"I eat when I'm sad and I'm sad because I'm fat."

"What does ISIS and a great joke have in common? A great execution."

"Which character of Pokemon is a jew? Ash"

"I got pulled over the other day... ..I was pretty scared so I just hung my arm out the window to let him know im not black"