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Joke of the Day

"Her parents wanted her to date someone of her own ethnicity. But Polly wanted a cracker."

"I got a new thesaurus Its pretty bad, though. Not only that, it's also bad."

"*sticks hand into jean pocket* Aw damn, why in the hell do I have bbq sauce in my pocket? *checks other pocket and finds nuggets* Oh, ok."

"What do Pink Floyd fans and NASCAR driver Kyle Larson have in common? They both love The Wall"

"What is the difference between a 2 year old and a bag of cocaine? Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out a window."

"I got kicked out of the cancer ward at my hospital today. Apparently laughter isn't the best medicine."

"What is a caterpillar's biggest fear? A dogerpillar."

"I'm going to open an ISIS themed cafe called Allahu Snackbar - our food is the bomb."

"""welcom to salad shop do u want a salad"" yes ""do u want chicken on it"" yes ""do u want bread on the side"" r u just selling unmade sandwiches"

"Why was the young kangaroo thrown out by his mother? For smoking in bed."