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Joke of the Day

"Her parents wanted her to date someone of her own ethnicity. But Polly wanted a cracker."

"damn demi, your rap battle opponent didn't even try to diss your clothes. what's your secret. [camera pans out to show all-orange outfit]"

"Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He kept himself up at night wondering if there really is a dog."

"What came first the chicken or the egg? The rooster."

"My internet was down for 5 minutes today So I went downstairs and spoke to my family. They seem like nice people."

"It puts the lotion in the basket. Then it calls the wife to make sure it's the right brand so it doesn't get the hose again."

"Sure, we can be friends. I get to be Chandler."

"What's a pirate's favorite letter? R? You'd think that but it's the C."

"Why was the teacher cross-eyed? He couldn't control his pupils."

"Why do black people have white hands and feet? Because everyone has a little bit of good in them."