37748

Joke of the Day

"Look, if all you have is candy corn in this van, I'm going to have to get out."

"What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant? Dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-antdead-antdead-ant"

"Today is national pet day. There is no touching of people in national pet day. I know this now."

"How long does 8 sleep for? Forever."

"Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken."

"Shortest maths joke < 0"

"What's the difference between a pre-pickled pickle and an ice tray full of semen? One of them is a cucumber and the other is a cumcuber."

"Joe Biden is in the White House kitchen right now licking every piece of silverware and putting them back in the drawer"

"How many Chinese people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, while the rest were kung fu fighting"

"The British are coming! The British are coming! The British have to get up early! The British swear they'll call you in the morning!"