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Joke of the Day

"Day 2 It's been two days since I've been on reddit, hopefully i have the strength to..... GOD DAMNIT!"

"I was feeling depressed, then saw a guy with one arm and thought ""oh man, I could be getting so much more sympathy if I was missing an arm!"""

"I like my women like I like my coffee Ground up and in the freezer."

"Nobody showed up for my Time Traveler-themed New Year's party I guess I shouldn't bother with sending the invitations next week after all."

"As told to me by an indian bus driver overseas... Why don't rabbits make noise when they fuck? Because they have cotton balls. Apologies if it's a repost."

"In titanic Jack could of lived..... But Rose just like taking more wood than she should"

"This Xanax script says I should take one daily as needed but I'm pretty sure they meant per child so, including the dogs, that makes five."

"Did you hear the one about a pony with a cough? It was a little horse."

"What's a karate experts favourite beverage? kar-a-TEA HA"

"People compare Trump and hitler all the time, but there is one major difference. Hitler was good at making speeches"