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Joke of the Day

"The Energizer Bunny was arrested this morning. Have you heard about this? Yeah, police say he was charged with battery."

"What are the pros and cons of wearing two watches? On one hand, you have a watch... But on the other hand, you have a watch."

"""My desires are... unconventional."" ""Show me."" *opens door to a room full of memes*"

"Today I got told I am condescending....... That means I talk down to people"

"Sorry I went down on your moms sister at your BBQ... I guess you could say I'm... [lowers shades] An aunt-eater."

"A Puerto Rican meteorologist sought counseling. When asked ""why?"" he replied, ""Tropical Depression."""

"What did one earthquake say to the other? .... .... Was that your fault or mine?"

"What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple? Finding a vein in a hot dog."

"My wife said she was leaving me because of my obsession with the band The Monkees, i thought she was joking... then i saw her face..."

"I saw Stevie Wonder in concert the other night He didn't see me though"