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Joke of the Day

"What are the pros and cons of wearing two watches? On one hand, you have a watch... But on the other hand, you have a watch."

"I went to the movies with a girl last night. I paid for the tickets & the snacks, & anything else I can before she reports her card stolen."

"what's the difference between a pitbull and a jewish broad? a pitbull will eventually let it go"

"Knock Knock Who's there ? Cigarette ! Cigarette who ? Cigarette life if you don't weaken !"

"How does Thor's brother like to party? He likes to keep it pretty Lo-key"

"There will be no screen names left for our children's children."

"Ever been in the middle of writing a great tweet and think, did I just run someone over?"

"I just put too much cream in my coffee. This is the worst Good Friday ever."

"I met my grandmother in Mexico She looked familia."

"You know how Hitler picked up hot Jewish girls? With a broom and dust pan."