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Joke of the Day

"Meets girl at bar. Takes her to Ikea. Quickly learns the difference between one-night stand and one nightstand."

"What's the difference between a homeless man and a trash can? One of them gets taken in every once in a while."

"An xbox and a ps4 were attacked .. here comes the ambulance WII U WII U WII U"

"For the last time I said CAULK, I need black CAULK. This isn't funny, what isle is it in"

"I'm sitting here watching this married couple argue in this restaurant. Then their 8 year old says ""oh great, dinner and a show."" Priceless."

"What foods are still good the second or third time you've eaten them? I'm looking for food for my human centipede..."

"What does a beer say when it's cold? Buuuurrrrrr!!!"

"What happens if an axe falls on your car? You have an ax-i-dent (accident)."

"I act like I don't care but deep inside I still don't give a fcuk."

"Don't you hate it when your girlfriend asks you to go deeper and you ran out of poems?"