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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I didn't pay 50 bucks to have a lentil on my face last night."

"How many perverts does it take to insert a light bulb? Only one; However, it takes an entire emergency ward to get it back out again."

"What's the worse part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair"

"I never took Complex Anal. in college So I had to find out about the residue theorem the hard way."

"I like my women like I like my golf scores In the 80s, with a slight handicap"

"Two muffins are sitting in a oven... One muffin says to the other, ""Damn, it's hot in here"". The other muffin says, ""HOLY SHIT! A TALKING MUFFIN!!"""

"What did Lochte say after his teammates told the police what really happened? ""...and I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you medaling kids!"""

"TIFU by installing the incorrect speaker parts in my car Oops, wrong sub!"

"What happened to the horse that swallowed a dollar bill? It bucked!"

"What do you call someone from Zimbabwe holding a bottle cap in their hand? A trillionaire."