35501

Joke of the Day

"There is so much lead in Flint That when you pass a factory, you immediately assume that Chinese children work there"

"SMS codes for seniors: BTW - Bring the Wheelchair FWIW - Forgot Where I Was LMDO - Laughing My Dentures Out WTFA - Wet the Furniture Again"

"What dinosaur has the best vocabulary? The bronthesaurus."

"I rank my kids by how many chores they do and how much they complain. My favorite child is the Roomba."

"Why was the belt locked up? Because it held a pair of pants."

"The tenth of October is the only day of the year that I would recommend 10/10"

"*to commander* Don't say anything too loud sir I suspect one of our men may be a plant *conspicuous tree in admiral uniform starts to sweat*"

"Why are men the best chefs? Because with only 2 nuts, one sausage, and a little bit of milk, they can fill a woman's stomach for 9 months."

"Why was the archeologist sad? His career was in ruins."

"What's an environmentalist's favorite part of a computer? The recycle bin."