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Joke of the Day
"I feel as useless as a Kardashian sister's library card."
Next Joke
"What did Captain Picard call his poop? Captain's log"
"What do you call a stupid asshole? Ignoranus"
"George Clooney and Brad Pitt fall in love and rob casinos together. #ExplainAFilmPlotBadly"
"Why do Marlboro cigarettes have white filters in America, but yellow filters in Europe? So Keith Richards can tell which continent he's in."
"My dishwasher makes this loud rumbling sound... Strange thing is, it only seems to happen at night, when she's sleeping."
"I actually loved the Twilight: Eclipse movie until I realized I was actually in an alley drunk watching two cats fight over a dead mouse."
"What's black and never works? Decaffeinated coffee you racist fuck."
"The police didn't believe me when I told them I found a flying carpet... They called the whole thing fabricated."
"It was hard work, but I finally fixed the laundry machine The wife beater is nice and clean again :)"