34935

Joke of the Day

"So my teacher asked why I was failing my loud music class... I told him the subject just wasn't my forte"

"Did you hear about the new virtual reality fellatio program? It's a real mind-blowing experience."

"Lost both my arms in an accident. The whole incident left me utterly humerless."

"I have a stepladder because.... My real ladder left me when I was young."

"Q: What did the green grape say to the purple grape? A: Breathe, idiot! BREATHE!"

"The Democratic National Committee. That's it. That's the entire fucking joke."

"What do Italians do when they're waiting for somthing? They pasta time."

"*Sexist Warning* ""Why is it called a waist?"" Because you can easily fit another pair of tits on there"

"You're really limiting yourself if you think sexual harassment is the only way to make your coworkers uncomfortable"

"Word. ~ Microsoft."