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Joke of the Day

"Tarzan doesn't have a beard. Yet he lives in the jungle for over 30 years."

"Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 89% water. I can walk on babies. I am... in jail."

"Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you."

"Why did the pig avoid the cooking class? Because he didn't like bakin"

"Hey Chumbawamba, we kept you down."

"Why is there only a stairway to heaven but a highway to hell? Easy. More traffic is going to hell."

"Do you know why so many American kids die in high school massacres? It's because they're not allowed to run in the corridors."

"Remember back in the olden days when we used wood-burning stoves and AOL?"

"I have a friend who doesn't drink coffee, so to stay alert at work he gets a healthy amount of sleep each night. What a loser"

"Hanging out with Helen Keller always made me feel like such a hipster. She'd never heard of any of the bands I like."