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Joke of the Day

"My wife and I are screaming at each other from different toilets while our sons shoot each other with bb guns"

"What is the difference between a tire and a black man? The tire doesn't start singing when you chain it."

"Someone told me it was important to have relationships with positive people. Now I have AIDS"

"My grandfather got new pants the other day. I asked him how they fit... He said ""Like a cheap castle."" Seeing the confused look on my face, he elaborated, saying, ""No ball room."""

"She believed me when i said concentration camps were for people with Attention Deficit Disorder."

"If attacked by a pack of clowns.... Go for the juggler."

"My daughter just said ""I goed potty in the fish bowl"". She is a 27 year old investment banker. Why did she goed potty there?"

"So Jared Fogle is heading to prison. I wonder if he'll go for a six inch or try the footlong?"

"What happened to the man with two wooden legs whose house burnt down? He fell on his ash."

"I don't think people should throw stones in regular houses either."