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Joke of the Day

"If I was a video game character, the 'B' button would activate my special move: Avoiding conversations."

"My tall sister took the vodka out of the cupboards above the fridge. I always thought those doors were just there for decoration."

"Texts from mom: Thanks to the supreme court, now it's not just women who won't marry you."

"I remember the first time I used a Universal Remote Control I thought to myself: ""Well, this changes everything."""

"Doctors have confirmed that masturbation is life threatening Many men have died after having a stroke"

"Liam Gallagher was never good in science. When asked to name 3 chemical elements, he said ""Gold and silver and sunshine."""

"Why can't PC gamers use Uber? Too many incompatible drivers."

"I thought I'd repost an old joke... Oops wrong sub..."

"My mom took my child into a store and left me in line to wait for Santa by myself, so now I look like a narcissistic creeper-thanks mom."

"You hate it ""No I just didn't think we'd spend our anniversary here"" *pssss* ""What was that?!"" The bouncy castle is deflating"