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Joke of the Day

"what do bad sex and the heimlich maneuver have in common? Both start out with lots of excitement, but then everyone is just relieved when its over"

"I just got told by my dentist that he is homosexual. Bloody Tooth Fairy!"

"1 in 5 people are Chinese. Only 5 people in my family, it's either mom or dad, brother Colin, younger brother Ho Chan. I think it's Colin."

"The 21st century: When deleting history is more important than making it."

"TIL if you type your password for all to see it gets censored. Look: 1337Penis Edit: GOD DANG IT"

"Why did the guitarist keep his condoms in his guitar case? He only needed them after he'd opened it."

"How do sheep sign their e-mails? Ewes sincerely."

"[being carried away by a colony of ants] haha nice let's see where this goes"

"Putting clothes on an animal is like putting on an overcoat over your overcoat."

"I'm trying to finish writing a script for a porno movie but there are just too many holes in the plot."