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Joke of the Day

"Keep away from professional dermatologists.. They make rash decisions"

"The jungle book has been adapted into a live action play But after the show at the Cincinnati zoo all other showings have been cancelled."

"*Cute girls approaches* ""You keep glancing over here, so I thought I'd come make the first move"" *Panics* *Starts making car alarm sounds*"

"Advertisers think we're like ""Oh a pop-up ad is in the way of the thing I actually want to watch? I should purchase whatever it's selling!"""

"What do you call a Mexican midget lady? Cuntswaylow"

"A horse walks into a bar and says, ""On a right-angled triangle with sides X, Y and Z, if X and Z are perpendicular, which side is opposite the right angle?"" The bartender says, ""Y, the long face."""

"I couldn't figure out how to use a seatbelt But then it clicked."

"What do you get when you cross the New World Order and risque behavior? The Illuminaughty"

"My girlfriend said a small penis was okay. But I still wish she didn't have one."

"It's impossible to look like a bad ass while eating a snow cone."