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Joke of the Day

"Advertisers think we're like ""Oh a pop-up ad is in the way of the thing I actually want to watch? I should purchase whatever it's selling!"""

"""Stuff that alligator in that dolphin"" - God creating sharks"

"What's blue, standing in the kitchen? STFU, I can paint my wife any colour I want!"

"Why doesn't Jesus play hockey? He doesn't want to get nailed to the Boards."

"After getting picked on by a few lads at college, my mum offered to go down and sort it out. Now they can't bully me for never having a blowjob any more."

"I recently started remodeling my house and quickly got in over my head, so I decided to get some professional help. I also hired a contractor to work on my house."

"What's the difference between a soy bean and a chick pea? I've never had a soy bean all over my face."

"What do Arabs and the Japanese have in common ? They both like bombs"

"I wrote a book about my car It was an auto-biography"

"A Haiku A problem that I Have with haikus is that I Always run out of"