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Joke of the Day

"Why did the scarecrow receive an award? ...because he was out standing in his field."

"Can you name two burgers who are royalty? Sir Loin and Burger King!"

"Nothing makes you look like an alcoholic more than not knowing how you got a cut on your face."

"""Hey Fred"" Yeah Barney? ""The Bee Gees have no hot chicks in the band"" Yeah but ABBA do!"

"My black pants had more cat hair on them after they came out of the dryer. Guess I should check the dryer for cats before I start it."

"10 reasons why doctors use defibrillators... Number 4 will shock you!"

"2nd grade poop joke going around. Knock knock. Who's there? Schmelmop."

"I spent too much money on video games this month. All of my savings have gone up in steam."

"I just changed my iPhone's name to ""Titanic"" and plugged it in. It's syncing now."

"So a baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender asks ""what can I get you?"". The baby seal replies "" anything but a Canadian club on the rocks""."