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Joke of the Day
"My 11 y/o brother told me this What is pickle bread before its baked? Dill dough"
Next Joke
"Facebook, Pinterest and Instagram have taught us that for every giant technological leap ahead, we will find a way to use it for dumb crap"
"The philosopher says the glass is half empty, the optimist says the glass is half full.... The sjw says the glass is half-fluid."
"Are you from the 316? Because you're an stone cold stunner. Edit: Stone not ice Thanks /u/cvillemade"
"My relationship with the time traveling girl was over before it began."
"I need to workout ASAP I gotta start working out or something man. Was struggling to get all the juice squeezed out of a lemon. Not cool"
"What's the best thing about Switzerland? I don't know, but their flag is a big plus."
"The amount of alcohol I would need to sleep with you would actually kill me."
"Baby, let's stay up all night and watch people Instagram the sunrise."
"How do people in other countries tell if kids are using drugs? Here in the U.S. we just ask them how many grams are in an ounce."