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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard the new Google Glass ad? You can talk to your mate while they are sitting on you face!"

"Why did the 16 year old Mexican girl get pregnant? Her teacher told her to go home and do an essay."

"So you wanna learn to speak with an Irish accent do you? Whale oil beef hooked."

"My girlfriend is ambidextrose she can polish off a box of chocolates with either hand."

"I tried to teach my grandma how to eat noodles with chopsticks She accidentally made a sweater."

"What's good about Switzerland? Not much, but the flag is a big plus."

"When you unfollow me, I find your name on a Coke bottle, shake it up, put it back on the shelf and whisper ""suck it"" under my breath."

"What do you call a Roman transvestite? Ben-Her."

"How do you build a flea circus? You have to start from scratch."

"I was out of tanning oil once, so I used PAM Cooking Spray. The tan didn't stick."