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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a python with a great bedside manner ? A snake charmer !"

"Him: I'm making you Produce Manager. Me: A PLUM assignment! H: ... M: You're a PEACH! H: ... M: Do I start today or TOMATO? H: You're fired."

"A guy tells his friend a long sleeping joke, which his friend hates. ""That was a bed joke,"" said his listening friend."

"[sound of can opening] wife: you're drinking a beer this early? me: c'mon...it's super bowl sunday wife: but we're still at church"

"I had sex while camping once It was fucking intentse."

"Oh, no! I only have fish eggs for dinner again! Roe is me!"

"What do you call bears without ears? B."

"What lands as often on its tail as it does its head? A penny."

"i've always struggled spelling out ""blood"" with my fingers because it always comes out looking like ""bbool"""

"I used to race motorcycles. Man, those things are a lot faster than me."