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Joke of the Day
"I had falafel for lunch... Now I feel awful."
Next Joke
"So I'm making a TV series about a plane hijacking.. We've just shot the pilot."
"When you're really angry, instead of saying a filthy curse word, try yelling ""Finnegan's Biscuits!"" I find it quite satisfying."
"Why don't you .... A husband asks his wife after sex ""Honey why don't you ever tell me when you are having an orgasm?"" She replies ""Well I would Dear but you are never home."""
"What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 5 drinks"
"[Starwars] How can you tell Luke is Uncircumcised? Because he has Force Kin."
"me: wow the stars are beautiful gf: omg babe they really are me: u know who else is beautiful? gf: *blushes* who? :3 me: Harambe"
"TIL that Hitler never ate cake Apparently all the ovens were already being used."
"Me: Check out that car. It has 400 horses. 5-year-old: Where does all the poop go?"
"What do you call a seafood restaurant that generates its own power? A fission-chips shop."