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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a hooker and Jesus? The look on their face when you're nailing them."

"What did the Mexican say after two houses fell on him? GET OFF ME HOMES!"

"My friend thinks he's smart He said that onions are the only food that can make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face."

"A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th Grade. Which one is the sexiest? HAA HAA HAA............... The blonde, because she's the only one who's 18."

"just got vinegar in my eye so I totally get it, girls who get vinegar in their eye"

"give a man a fish and you feed him for a day Teach a man how to Google how to fish and he'll watch fish porn for the rest of his life"

"What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire? A pumpkin!"

"My girlfriend told me to roleplay as her daddy. So I left her."

"Why did the farmer make a high-pitched gasp? Because he was tired of the sigh-low."

"Kim Jong died. I guess you could say he was a little il."