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Joke of the Day
"I got fired from my job at the cemetery yesterday... I made a grave mistake."
Next Joke
"I sleep with a knife under my bed in case I can't open my midnight snacks. It also comes in handy if people try to steal them."
"My favorite exercise at the gym is lateral neck turns, which is where I walk in, shake my head ""no,"" and leave immediately."
"i'm sorry but hating something that lots of people love doesn't automatically make u an interesting person"
"Got really drunk and had unprotected sex with the cashier at 7-11 last night. Hope I don't catch slurpees."
"An 11-year-old student of mine just told me this. What do you call a singing computer? Adele."
"Hi I am an NSA employee Tell me anything."
"a romantic scene where we're running toward each other but then i run past you and pick up your dog"
"My favorite way to mop the bathroom floor is to give the kids a bath. The walls, too. Yup, and ceiling."
"Why do terrorists have high sex drives? Because their sperms are always ready and eager for suicide missions."