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Joke of the Day
"My mum told me I was her third favourite child..... .... I'm an only child"
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"If you can't handle me at my Walmart, you don't deserve me at my Target."
"My girl said she need distance and time Still dont know what she's trying to calculate the velocity of..."
"Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tyred. Alexa gave me that one. Bing Bang boom."
"""Nice"" - first kangaroo to realise it had a pocket"
"David Cameron sends Alex Salmond a text following the Scottish vote... David: ""Hi mate just checking in, u k?"""
"Janet: What's the difference between a cake and a school bus ? Jill: I don't know. Janet: I'm glad I didn't send you to pick up my birthday cake !"
"What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Mice cream and cake!"
"Definition of a Masochist... *Definition of a Masochist:* ***""Beat me! Beat me!""*** *Definition of a Sadist:* ***""No!""***"
"What's a redditors favorite Imagine Dragons song GOLD!"